Well we have been very, very busy. On Friday February 12, 2010 we went to Sugar Creek Elementary School to meet the Psychologist, Joanne Shields, and so Dominick could be evaluated for early intervention in the school system. Ashlee, our in home therapist from Easter Seals, set up the meeting and met us at the school. Not the closest school to us but not too far away either. Beautiful school!
We went into a small conference room. There were some toys in the room for Dominick to play with. I began answering questions and telling our story, I now have a stock speech. She began to explain how the early intervention will work and what we need to get done before he becomes enrolled.
They will be working with Dominick on basic skills such as putting on and taking off shoes and clothes, feeding himself, interacting with others, dealing with structure, dealing with stress and how to deal with "NO", colors, shapes, textures, speech therapy and most importantly... POTTY TRAINING! And so much more.
Dominick was his usual funny, "Mr. Personality", hammy, cute self. He started his gibber gabber while we were talking. He would come up to the table, blow with his lips puckered making a loud noise and then start to fake laugh, "HA HA HE HE HA HA HA HE HA". Joanne made the comment that she is going to love working with him. After filling out paper work we were done. Task one done. Check.
Then on Monday I get a call from Tega Cay Speaks, Speech and Occupational therapy. Ashlee arranged for them to call me. Did I mention she is my hero? They were able to get me in today before my time with Ashlee. Two great things about Tega Cay Speaks, one, they are less than a mile away from me, two, Dominick can get both therapies he needs in one location. I go through the question and answer formality and give my "Stock Speech". She observes Dominick. Paper work. Dominick will be attending speech therapy two times a week for 30 minute sessions. YAY! Task two done. Check. The Occupational Therapist will be calling me to set up time for an evaluation within the next week or so.
Ashlee came over after our Tega Cay Speaks appointment. Dominick lit up when she came in. He immediately went for her bag of toys. He pulled out a ball she had on top. She was working on getting him to answer her and respond to verbal cues. After the ball she pulled out a puzzle with emergency vehicles on it, a police car, fire engine, helicopter, motorcycle and tow truck. She would hold up two pieces and ask him which one he wanted. He did a great job of answering her and telling her which one he wanted. After he put all the pieces in the correct spots she would ask him what each one was. She pointed to the police car and asked him what kind it was. He said, "That’s a car." WE HAVE A SENTENCE! Ashlee and I looked at each other in disbelief. SO HAPPY.
Everything is coming together. I now have a game plan. I now have therapies in place for my Monkey. I am getting him enrolled in school. Man I LOVE PROGRESS!
Thursday, February 18, 2010
Monday, February 8, 2010
Today Is My Happy Day
We started giving Dominick a liquid vitamin supplement almost two months ago. Since then the progress Dominick has made is INCREDIBLE! Just this past Saturday he made a friend in Gymboree, Ricky. He played and interacted with him. And he even participated a little in the activities. This is a first for Dominick. Other than Sage, my four year old nephew, Dominick doesn't have anything to do with other children. He likes older kids a lot better than kids his age. Then today at Gymboree he blew me away. He did every single activity. He sang the songs, he did all the activities, he talked to Miss Terry and Miss Susan, he played with Blake and Gretchen and he answered the questions when Miss Terry asked him something.
I truly believe that the vitamins are making a difference.
Last Thursday Ashlee from Easter Seals came by the house for the first time. She is Dominick's in home therapist. From the moment she walked in Dominick fell in love with her. She brought over a lot of toys to play with Dominick. She did an evaluation and asked me a ton of questions. She went over a plan for Dominick and his treatment and therapy.
She is setting up genetic counseling and testing for him. She is setting up ABA therapy workshop for us which Easter Seals will pay, thank goodness because WOW the cost! She is setting up Speech and Occupational Therapy with Tega Speaks which is right down the street from us. She is setting up Dominick to enroll in the school system. She is getting us enrolled in financial help programs for help with all the therapies. Baby Net will end when he turns 3 so she is trying to get it extended for us until he is age 5.
Ashlee called me this morning and in just one business day she managed to get us in with Tega Speaks for the Speech Therapy. He might have to go to another Occupational Therapist because of the waiting list at Tega Speaks but she is checking and will let me know later today and she already has an alternate lined up in Pineville. She has already got an appointment for us to have an evaluation with York County Schools on Friday.
Ashlee will be coming over every Wednesday for one hour of therapy. I LOVE HER! In one day she has accomplished more for me than any Doctor Dominick has seen. She is my HERO!
Today is a great day. Today is my happy day. Thank you Vitamins. Thank you Ashlee. And best of all THANK YOU DOMINICK FOR BLESSING MY LIFE.
You have to have the bad days to remind you of how great the good days are. My friend Michelle told me that. Thanks.
I truly believe that the vitamins are making a difference.
Last Thursday Ashlee from Easter Seals came by the house for the first time. She is Dominick's in home therapist. From the moment she walked in Dominick fell in love with her. She brought over a lot of toys to play with Dominick. She did an evaluation and asked me a ton of questions. She went over a plan for Dominick and his treatment and therapy.
She is setting up genetic counseling and testing for him. She is setting up ABA therapy workshop for us which Easter Seals will pay, thank goodness because WOW the cost! She is setting up Speech and Occupational Therapy with Tega Speaks which is right down the street from us. She is setting up Dominick to enroll in the school system. She is getting us enrolled in financial help programs for help with all the therapies. Baby Net will end when he turns 3 so she is trying to get it extended for us until he is age 5.
Ashlee called me this morning and in just one business day she managed to get us in with Tega Speaks for the Speech Therapy. He might have to go to another Occupational Therapist because of the waiting list at Tega Speaks but she is checking and will let me know later today and she already has an alternate lined up in Pineville. She has already got an appointment for us to have an evaluation with York County Schools on Friday.
Ashlee will be coming over every Wednesday for one hour of therapy. I LOVE HER! In one day she has accomplished more for me than any Doctor Dominick has seen. She is my HERO!
Today is a great day. Today is my happy day. Thank you Vitamins. Thank you Ashlee. And best of all THANK YOU DOMINICK FOR BLESSING MY LIFE.
You have to have the bad days to remind you of how great the good days are. My friend Michelle told me that. Thanks.
Monday, February 1, 2010
Can't Sleep + Google Autism = Crying
Navigating through so many different websites on Autism is difficult, confusing, depressing, hopeful, interesting and stomach turning to say the least. I Google autism. Then I Google autism awareness. Then autism therapies. Then autism YouTube. Then autism blogs. I forgot my own rule I made for myself. Rule: Only digest a limited amount of information at a time so not to feel over whelmed or too sad. Oopsie. Not to mention Full Moon and PMS are great contributing factors to my emotional stability right now.
It is amazing the amount of support there is out there. Autism Speaks, National Autism Association, Autism Society of America, Autism Support Network, Easter Seals, Generation Rescue and on and on. The amount of information to digest is endless. Am I learning the correct information? Am I looking in the right direction? For every great response to each organization there is a negative out there as well.
On YouTube you can see a lot of wonderful videos of children, different therapies in practice, informational fundraisers. There are a few dedications to parents and children with music and pictures that will just get your gut wrenching and tears a flowing.
The blogs are very interesting to read. A lot of opinions on how vaccines are the cause. Or how mercury is the cause. Or how diet will or will not work. Along with a lot of pictures of beautiful children.
I can't remember where I read this but it went something along the lines of:
Imagine being in a foreign country for one day not being able to speak the language. Only recognizing a few words. Not being able to ask anyone for help. Not being able to understand anyone and them not being able to understand you. Not being able to read their reactions to you and you not being able to understand them as well. Not being able to convey to anyone what you need or want, if you are sick or hurt, hungry or thirsty or tired. Now imagine you have to live this way every day. This is the life of autism.
I read someone's response to a YouTube video of a mother who was just expressing her story of her daughter. We have a similar story. The anger in response to what I thought a beautiful video of love for her daughter was terrifying for me to read. One person said, "You quote that more children are diagnosed with autism than cancer and aids combined. Your child isn't going to die from autism. Autism isn't a death sentence." You know what, you're right. It isn't a death sentence. It is a life sentence.
I can only hope that one day my son will grow out of this. I can only hope that he will continue to hug me. That he will call me Mommy again. That he will be able to go to school with other kids and be able to function as well as them. I have every hope in the world that this will happen for us. I have every hope that all these hopes I have of simple everyday activities will be replaced with the bigger dreams I once had for him and still do its just they take a back seat to the smaller ones now. I just do not have any guarantees that this day will come. Only the hopes that this day will come.
One in every 110 children. One in every 70 boys. That is some very scary odds for the future of this country. Who will take care of all these children?
To end this on a happier note… We do laugh from time to time. On our way home from dinner tonight, Marty was getting Dominick to repeat stuff in the car. Marty, “Say One” Dominick, “Say One” Marty, “Say Dominick” Dominick, “Dominick” Marty, “Mi nombre es Dominick” Dominick, “gibber gabber gibber gabber” Deva, “Our son isn’t autistic. He’s Spanish!” Well it was funny to us.
It is amazing the amount of support there is out there. Autism Speaks, National Autism Association, Autism Society of America, Autism Support Network, Easter Seals, Generation Rescue and on and on. The amount of information to digest is endless. Am I learning the correct information? Am I looking in the right direction? For every great response to each organization there is a negative out there as well.
On YouTube you can see a lot of wonderful videos of children, different therapies in practice, informational fundraisers. There are a few dedications to parents and children with music and pictures that will just get your gut wrenching and tears a flowing.
The blogs are very interesting to read. A lot of opinions on how vaccines are the cause. Or how mercury is the cause. Or how diet will or will not work. Along with a lot of pictures of beautiful children.
I can't remember where I read this but it went something along the lines of:
Imagine being in a foreign country for one day not being able to speak the language. Only recognizing a few words. Not being able to ask anyone for help. Not being able to understand anyone and them not being able to understand you. Not being able to read their reactions to you and you not being able to understand them as well. Not being able to convey to anyone what you need or want, if you are sick or hurt, hungry or thirsty or tired. Now imagine you have to live this way every day. This is the life of autism.
I read someone's response to a YouTube video of a mother who was just expressing her story of her daughter. We have a similar story. The anger in response to what I thought a beautiful video of love for her daughter was terrifying for me to read. One person said, "You quote that more children are diagnosed with autism than cancer and aids combined. Your child isn't going to die from autism. Autism isn't a death sentence." You know what, you're right. It isn't a death sentence. It is a life sentence.
I can only hope that one day my son will grow out of this. I can only hope that he will continue to hug me. That he will call me Mommy again. That he will be able to go to school with other kids and be able to function as well as them. I have every hope in the world that this will happen for us. I have every hope that all these hopes I have of simple everyday activities will be replaced with the bigger dreams I once had for him and still do its just they take a back seat to the smaller ones now. I just do not have any guarantees that this day will come. Only the hopes that this day will come.
One in every 110 children. One in every 70 boys. That is some very scary odds for the future of this country. Who will take care of all these children?
To end this on a happier note… We do laugh from time to time. On our way home from dinner tonight, Marty was getting Dominick to repeat stuff in the car. Marty, “Say One” Dominick, “Say One” Marty, “Say Dominick” Dominick, “Dominick” Marty, “Mi nombre es Dominick” Dominick, “gibber gabber gibber gabber” Deva, “Our son isn’t autistic. He’s Spanish!” Well it was funny to us.
Patience Has A Whole New Meaning
For those of you who know me patience is something I haven't had a whole lot of in my life. I hate surprise parties. I can't ever seem to get a gift for someone to early because I always tell them what it is or give it to them early. My poor daughter can also testify to my lack of patience. She knows all too well. Especially those who I don't have a close personal relationship with. I have zero patience with incompetence. Simple tasks that are not followed or are done incorrectly make me want to scream my head off. Poor Marty, my husband, has been a punching bag for my lack of patience. I get this from both of my parents. HARD HEADED!
I used to be a person who would say, "You can't teach an old dog new tricks!" I would especially apply that one to myself. I don't believe this any longer. Dominick has taught me the meaning of patience.
Before we knew of Dominick's diagnosis I would be sitting with him at lunch. I would ask him if he was done or all finished. I would get nothing back. Not a verbal response. Not a look of acknowledgement. Nothing. I would tell him he could get down once he responded. Just say "All done" or "Finished" or "Down". He would just sit there and do nothing. I some days would beg for a response, "Please baby just talk to Mommy. Just say all done or down. Please." I did my best not to let him see me upset or cry. I did my best not to let him hear it in my voice. But he did at times. I wonder if he understood why I was upset or if he can understand.
Potty training is a whole new bag of tricks for me. I have a potty training video he watches and we have Pee Pee Potty Time where I take him to his potty and put him on it. He used to sit on the potty for a minute but now he just wants to take the potty apart and play in the bathroom. I still haven't gotten lucky once with him sitting on the potty. How do you get someone who doesn't ask for anything to tell you he needs to potty? How do you explain to someone who might not even understand what you are saying how to use the potty? I would like to take this moment to thank my daughter Hailey for being the perfect baby and being so easy to potty train.
I never know if Dominick is hungry. I never know if Dominick is thirsty. I never know if he is craving a certain food or a certain drink. I give him something to eat and drink throughout the day just because it is time to eat or drink. I don't know if he is actually hungry or thirsty. He has never told me.
Time outs still do work. He does know when he is doing something he shouldn't do. And if we have to tell him more than once he goes to time out. We tell him why he is and what he did and what he should do instead. Does he understand it all? I hope so.
I will say I am very proud of myself for not raising my voice and yelling. This is something very hard for me. That is usually my first response. I am a yeller. I like to raise my voice to a very loud level. It was how I was raised. It has been all I have known. So for me to not yell is a huge step forward for me. Don't get me wrong, I AM NOT PERFECT. I have some slips. But not with Dominick. I am doing it right with him.
Frustration is a part of life for me now. Dominick isn't the only frustration factor in my life. I hear someone say, "I just wish they would stop asking me questions", or "I wish they would just stop saying Mama", or "I just wish he would leave me alone". They just really do not know how lucky they are. I would love to have any of those options. Doctors are a huge part of it. The whole process of finding help for Dominick is frustrating. I am trying to be patient and let the whole process work. The lack of info from everyone and the passing of the buck is enough to make me explode. I accept it. That is all I can do. I let go.
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, The courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference.
The serenity prayer takes on a whole new meaning for me. It never had true meaning for me before when I said it. I didn't have a real struggle to go through. Now I understand it truly.
I used to be a person who would say, "You can't teach an old dog new tricks!" I would especially apply that one to myself. I don't believe this any longer. Dominick has taught me the meaning of patience.
Before we knew of Dominick's diagnosis I would be sitting with him at lunch. I would ask him if he was done or all finished. I would get nothing back. Not a verbal response. Not a look of acknowledgement. Nothing. I would tell him he could get down once he responded. Just say "All done" or "Finished" or "Down". He would just sit there and do nothing. I some days would beg for a response, "Please baby just talk to Mommy. Just say all done or down. Please." I did my best not to let him see me upset or cry. I did my best not to let him hear it in my voice. But he did at times. I wonder if he understood why I was upset or if he can understand.
Potty training is a whole new bag of tricks for me. I have a potty training video he watches and we have Pee Pee Potty Time where I take him to his potty and put him on it. He used to sit on the potty for a minute but now he just wants to take the potty apart and play in the bathroom. I still haven't gotten lucky once with him sitting on the potty. How do you get someone who doesn't ask for anything to tell you he needs to potty? How do you explain to someone who might not even understand what you are saying how to use the potty? I would like to take this moment to thank my daughter Hailey for being the perfect baby and being so easy to potty train.
I never know if Dominick is hungry. I never know if Dominick is thirsty. I never know if he is craving a certain food or a certain drink. I give him something to eat and drink throughout the day just because it is time to eat or drink. I don't know if he is actually hungry or thirsty. He has never told me.
Time outs still do work. He does know when he is doing something he shouldn't do. And if we have to tell him more than once he goes to time out. We tell him why he is and what he did and what he should do instead. Does he understand it all? I hope so.
I will say I am very proud of myself for not raising my voice and yelling. This is something very hard for me. That is usually my first response. I am a yeller. I like to raise my voice to a very loud level. It was how I was raised. It has been all I have known. So for me to not yell is a huge step forward for me. Don't get me wrong, I AM NOT PERFECT. I have some slips. But not with Dominick. I am doing it right with him.
Frustration is a part of life for me now. Dominick isn't the only frustration factor in my life. I hear someone say, "I just wish they would stop asking me questions", or "I wish they would just stop saying Mama", or "I just wish he would leave me alone". They just really do not know how lucky they are. I would love to have any of those options. Doctors are a huge part of it. The whole process of finding help for Dominick is frustrating. I am trying to be patient and let the whole process work. The lack of info from everyone and the passing of the buck is enough to make me explode. I accept it. That is all I can do. I let go.
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, The courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference.
The serenity prayer takes on a whole new meaning for me. It never had true meaning for me before when I said it. I didn't have a real struggle to go through. Now I understand it truly.
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